Exploring the First Trimester of Pregnancy As A Full-Time Entrepreneur
Why didn't you share your pregnancy news sooner? You share about your entrepreneurship journey and holistic life, so why not this?
As I embark on the incredible journey of building a little human inside me, I've been overwhelmed by the outpouring of love and curiosity from friends and family. One question that keeps popping up is, "How do you do it all while pregnant?" The short answer is I just couldn't. My body simply wouldn't allow it.
After years of working on myself physically and mentally, I thought I was ready for this new chapter. However, the first trimester hit me like a ton of bricks. The changes my body underwent broke me down, both physically and emotionally. I found myself confined to my bed, couch, or pregnancy pillow, barely able to move.
For the first time in my life, my emotions, body, and routines seemed utterly out of my control. This was a reality I wasn't prepared for. I sought help from medical professionals and my network, and while I received an abundance of empathy and support from my mom tribe, the recurring message was that this experience was entirely normal. Even medically, I was assured that what I was going through was utterly ordinary.
But where are the conversations about the first trimester happening, online or offline? Despite my extensive research, nothing could have fully prepared me for the experience. If I were to describe it for someone who hasn't conceived visually, it felt like being repeatedly hit by a truck for 12 weeks straight. Yeah, it was that intense.
I even joked with my partner, Anshul, questioning the point of all the physical, mental, and emotional work I had put in or the countless books I had read when, ultimately, my hormones were running the show!
The only way I could navigate this challenging period was to exist, taking it one moment at a time. It required a complete surrender to the universe and an unwavering trust in the process. In many ways, pregnancy mirrors entrepreneurship, but it's like entrepreneurship on high-performing drugs without any energy. It's a wild ride.
So why am I sharing this now? The answer is simple – to raise awareness. If you are trying to conceive or have someone in your life in their first trimester, it's crucial to understand that even though they may not look pregnant, their body, mind, and emotions work overtime.
They are undertaking a journey they've never experienced before. So, show them grace, support, and empathy.
Let's dive deeper into how I truly felt during this time, both the good and the bad.
What I don’t love about pregnancy so far:
Extreme fatigue: I experienced a level of exhaustion I never knew existed. Even the simplest tasks felt like climbing a mountain. I was a hustling founder who gave 20+ a day to build my companies.
Nausea and vomiting: Morning sickness is a misleading term because, for many women, it lasts all day. I struggled to eat anything and lost weight in those early weeks.
Mood swings: My emotions were on a rollercoaster, and I found myself crying at the drop of a hat. The hormonal changes were no joke. I was outraged at some tweets. I mean, things that generally don't bother or affect me in the least are now A BIG DEAL. I was binge-watching Grey's Anatomy. Make what you want of that. LOL!
Loss of control: As someone who thrives on routine and control, surrendering to the unpredictability of pregnancy was a major challenge. I think this is something I felt I had excelled as an entrepreneur. BUT NO, the loss you will constantly feel in a world that wants you to be productive is not something you can prepare for.
What I do love about pregnancy:
Miraculous changes: Despite the discomfort, knowing that my body was creating a new life filled me with awe and wonder. I mean, the thought of how organically my mind, body, and soul knew this process made me realize that nothing in the world needs too much effort. Yes, it was hard work but organic work. My body was indeed in a state of flow, and right now, 28 weeks pregnant, it still is. I have found this renewed faith in the magic that our bodies are—something I clearly needed reminding of.
Heightened intuition: I became more attuned to my body's needs and learned to trust my instincts. I have realized that cravings and habits are my body's way of reminding me of what I need the most, and I am honoring them now.
Deeper connection: The experience brought my partner and me closer as we navigated this journey together. The transformation I have seen in Anshul is something I can write another article about. In the last six months, I have seen this human change his entire life to prepare for parenthood. It has made me realize how important it is to select a partner who will contribute equally to this journey.
Community support: The outpouring of love and understanding from other moms was a lifeline during those difficult weeks. I realized that empathy, the benefit of the doubt, and pure love from other moms changed my perception of nurturing parents as leaders. I think these are the leaders we need more in today's society, who make space for you, give you grace, and hold opportunities for you. Thank you to each one of them.
The first trimester is a transformative experience that challenges you in unexpected ways. It's a time of surrender, self-discovery, and trust in the incredible process of creating life.
During my first trimester, Anshul said that women have a unique way of reaching enlightenment through this process. And I agree. The complete surrender, the pain, and the internal breakdown that goes on only get you closely connected to the universe or divinity (if you believe in it). There is nothing more selfless than this!
By sharing my story, I hope to normalize the conversation around the realities of early pregnancy and encourage others to extend compassion and understanding to those embarking on this remarkable journey.
Remember, expecting moms, you are not alone. Embrace the good, ride out the bad, and know that you are doing something extraordinary. And to the support systems surrounding these incredible creators, your love and empathy mean the world. Together, we can create a more open and supportive dialogue around the beautiful, messy, and awe-inspiring pregnancy journey.
Now, we come to the question of how you do it all. You are creating a human, running 2 businesses and a professor. How do you do it all?
I do not have a blueprint, sorry! Because I am figuring it out as I go so, here are a few thoughts that are going through my mind as I continue to 'do it all' -
Doing it all is not my goal! NOPE! I have nothing to prove, no FOMO, no fear. And this has come after seeing the height of success and the pits of failure. I have realized all this is life. It will be this ebbing sea saw of ups and downs. The world will only see what they want. So, I am here to live the way I want and do things that create joy and meaning for me.
I am constantly thinking about how this human will need love, security, and a healthy amount of detachment so they can grow to be their unique selves. For this, I need to pursue my path as a nurturer and everything else. So when the time comes, I can give them the healthy space needed to develop. I don't know if this is right or wrong. But, like I said, I am sharing the things going on in my mind.
I love the feeling of creating this human, but I am also in love with teaching and building. We are all an amalgam of many moods and phases, and I am embracing them all. Some days, I am more of a professor, others a nurturer, and some days, a creator. We have all of this inside of us.
I have the privilege and support system to do it all. No one asks me or questions me, and I am truly joyous in the fact that I am doing everything I can. I don't see many people with such a privilege. Someday, I hope this is normal because it truly takes a village to build a human life!
I have fewer attachments, so when we had to move across the country in a few weeks, I could easily do that. I don't know if this is good or bad, but it was surely easy to do!
I have the safety net to cherish this time and not worry about limited maternity/paternity leave. Both Anshul and I can work entirely remotely, and we have people who want to support us in this journey.
My mom - I see her as a new person! I have so much respect for her and am in complete awe of everything she has done in her life. Superheroes exist in people who create humans, and they walk amongst us as if they were no big deal!! It is just wild, and thanking them for making us seems like a trivial gesture.
MY TEAM—If I have done one thing right, it is creating a team that I can trust and truly wants to see our businesses grow. I don't think I could do this without the humans on my team.
Finally, let me share - What lessons am I taking as an entrepreneur from this phase of my life:
Commitment—My whole view about entrepreneurship has shifted to long-term plans. As a previous startup builder, I was entirely on board with the idea of going fast. Still, now, the quality that makes a creator or entrepreneur last is a lasting commitment to building something meaningful. I don't know if this is really the epiphany from building a human, but I see that we have a lot of time in our existence, so why not commit to a mission and truly fulfill it?
Organic/State of flow - Things will happen, and if you push too hard, something needs to shift. Most of our lives are out of our control, so do what you can best with what you have right now. That is not dreaming small; it is accepting that you are unique and naturally gifted to do different things. I know I will bring notable companies and get opportunities. Things will happen organically.
Hard things about hard things - Nothing is easy in life, and hardship is the lesson. The bird has to find feed every day; the sun needs to rise every day; I have to work hard for the rest of my existence. So, instead of hoping for ease, I now wish for strength and capability to show up and experience this holistic life.
So, if you are on this journey of building things, becoming a parent, and figuring out life, I am not hoping you get inspired by this NO! I hope you find the space to exist and not fight between creating a balance between everything you want and wish to do. I hope you find the support, the opportunities to grow, and the option to choose the best life for you.
Do it all, or don't do it all. That is not the goal. You have one life; live it, experience it, and do everything you can. And give it a chance to show you its full spectrum.
Love and hugs,
Arjita